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Basketball, Preseason Game 2
We won. Against the OTHER Air Force team. Sure it was preseason, but winning by 10 because of solid team defense is much better than losing by 50 (no exaggeration).
Still no stats, but I know I played much better than last game AND with a smile. AND I managed to learn how to play 2-3 defense beforehand, so everything was much better.
The game is slowing down, and I’m seeing the court better. Still, MOAR ballhandling practice and more defense. That’s how I’ll play more and help out more on a 15-man deep team. Just like Jeremy Lin says, I’m young and I’m gonna get better.
Oh, and Happy Valentine’s Day :-D
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Basketball
I think whenever I play anything official, I get too worked up with the the outcome, and forget to enjoy myself. SO I’m gonna start blogging after each ballgame (….oh, update: I’m playing IM basketball now) to get my thoughts on how to improve. We got whupped today, so there’s a lot to improve:
1. More ballhandling practice! If I want the ball more, get better at it!
2. Learn 2-3 zone defense and OWN IT.
3. More sprints!
4. Even more ballhandling!
5. HAVE FUN. Play with a smile even.
To me, item #5 is the most important. I play my best when I have fun, and so do my teammates. Next game mode!
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How in the world can this boy save the world through his blog?
…If he doesn’t write in it?
I know it’s been ages, but I know I still got it.
Dear Jeff, you’re a very good writer. Please set aside time and energy for you to start writing again. Especially now that you’re inspired.
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I don’t normally post anything beyond writing and videos, but this one’s pretty good.
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Whelmed
I’ve had a pretty long week, full of good things, and sprinkled with a few bad things. The glimpses I’ve been given of my next week haven’t been so kind to me. Whenever I face uncertainty, or the odds become stacked against me, I’m humbled and I remember that I never have to take on things with my own power, because I WILL come up short. I thank God for ensuring that I never have to.
In times like these, I’m not OVERwhelmed, I’m simply: whelmed.
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Opportuni Tea Cost, Part I
I’m leaving for the Air Force on December 27. I’m aware that a lot of you know that already (the people who keep up with my blog regularly happen to be my best friends), but a lot more of you actually don’t know that fact. Not only will I be leaving pretty much everything behind for the next four years, I’ll also be entering a job that I never expected. After bootcamp, I’ll be trained as an Airborne Cryptologic Linguist Apprentice. What that means is that I’ll be a rookie who translates foreign intel from a different language, after deciphering the code, while being flown in a recon aircraft.
This is not what I expected. I was planning on getting a nice desk job that would keep me busy and get me paid so I can go to law school. Instead, I’ll be doing this complicated flying job that requires me to go through survival training (think Man v. Wild, or any other Discovery Channel survival show) and extra combat training, in case my plane gets shot down. At the end of my term, I’ll be able to live in the wild AND I’ll be a trained killer. I clearly have mixed feelings about this, but I am definitely excited. I’m emotionally ready, and I’ve been trying to get my body ready for the hardship that is to come.
But that life update isn’t the point of this blog entry. Because of this somewhat recent news (and my even more recent contract signing for the job), I’ve been forced to consider my mortality and really think about the different things in my life. As with all my entries, this goes back to girls.
One of the things I’ve had to accept pretty early on is that, even if I wanted to, I can’t be with anybody. Even if we BOTH wanted to, I can’t be in a relationship. It was only recently that I found out I’m leaving in December and not October, but it still doesn’t change the fact that it’s hard to be with someone knowing the both of you have an expiration date.
For me, this mindset has affected a lot of the decisions I’ve had to make when it comes to dealing with the girls in my life. Generally, knowing that I’m leaving has made me be a lot more honest to people and more active in seeking/enjoying their company. This has been true for a lot of my friends in general, and it’s doubly true for certain girls. I’ve taken many different measures to express my feelings, whether it’s a five page handwritten magnum opus, midnight conversations, or even important DTR sessions.
The unfortunate thing is that, even if I express my feelings, and get something positive back, nothing can come of it. My departure honestly won’t be that bad. It’s Texas for about two months, then a guaranteed year-plus at Monterey. My biggest problem is with the distance, and the work/commitment it requires to make it work. Most of you know that I’ve been there before, and, while I’d be ready for distance myself, I’m not willing to put any girl through it. Starting a relationship for a few months and then leaving right away is not easy on anybody. Not to mention the constant worry that comes when having a loved one in the military. No, I have not seen “Dear John” yet, but I’m assuming the movie gives you guys a good idea of what it’d be like.
Where the problem lies, and where my title comes in, is my fear of the unknown. I’ve met some incredible women, and developed feelings for them at different times, and my fear is that I won’t find anyone up to their standard and will have to settle for the best of what’s available AKA the Opportunity Cost.
To be continued.
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Know Your Audience
I know my audience. It’s not necessarily the people who have subscribed to me, or the random people stalking me. Nope. This blog is for ME, and for the people like me: hopeless romantics, hypercompetitive athletes, perfectionists, and any other identity I choose to take on. This blog is also an exercise of transcribing my mind and my heart into writing. There’s also a not-so-well hidden dose of Christian thought and spiritual reflection. Sprinkle in some random stream-of-consciousness, filter everything with enough self-censorship to make me feel better about making things public, and you pretty much have the mindset behind my entries.
With than in mind, prepare for another blockbuster entry I’m currently working on in my Drafts folder.
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No-Black Tea
Two of my boys found out the truth yesterday. It was the truth because I was even lying to myself about it.
There are certain people that, when we get ourselves into a situation where we just settle down and talk, get me in this mode where I just start ranting emotionally about the things that either frustrate me or excite me. If you know what I’m talking about, you’re probably one of those people. When this happens, it becomes difficult to stop, and eventually, the truth comes out. Those people mean a lot to me, because I trust them enough to lower my guard.
It’s just too bad some of them left :-(
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Self Censorship AKA Jeff vs. Id
It’s 2:30, I’ve been lacking sleep all weekend, I’m tired as a mofo, and I’m probably gonna miss church tomorrow for the third week in a row. The reason for all this is my moving out of my apartment into the next one across the yard. More on that later, but I did wanna get straight to the meat of this entry.
I have these moments late at night when I’m just tired and things catch up with me and make me upset. A lot of times, I don’t know what to do, so I sometimes end up on tumblr to just vent out my thoughts. As some of you may have seen, this leads to emo entries or rage entries.
I was gonna go ahead and do the same thing tonight, and probably a lot of you will enjoy it or be confused by it, but I know better. Venting on tumblr can be great at times, but now when it can possibly get you in trouble. You never know who reads these things. Until then, I’ll keep it to myself and wait on the next batch of my new favorite tea.
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